Juan of Words

Mexicanismos, El Grito, La Pachanga, Y La Patria

Mexico, Lindo y Querido...

Like true mexicanos, today we’re turning a blind eye on all the bad, laughing instead of crying, and celebrating the fact que a pesar de todo hoy nuestra patria cumple 200 años de independencia!

¡¡¡¡AAAAEEEEEEE!!!!

Yes the country is in a state of disarray.  Our people across the border and government are inundated with crime, violence, and corruption.  And this side of the border, we’re not faring any better!  But in all honesty, you’ve gotta hand it to our people for not letting the constant bad news get us down.  O como dirían en mi rancho: ‘Entrémosle a la pachanga – ¡a Dios rogando y a San Pedro bailando!’

Aquí, a compilation of just of few of my own favorite Mexican things:

El Grito.  Don’t be caught looking like these guys in a random YouTube video drunken, dazed and confused.  Get it straight and do it right!

Cheves. Any variety, any color container, although for an occasion such as this you might as well stick to the classics,  DosXX, Victoria or Corona tonight!

Sabrosa, sabrosita!

Mariachi. Need I say more?  And then composers like Jose Alfredo Jimenez!

Papel Picado. Great for any occasion, and you don’t have to take it down ever if you don’t want to.

Colorin Colorado

Salsa. Chiles, Cholula, Tabasco, Valentina; any and all salsas I love!  Can’t eat without them.  Ask anyone that knows me.

Ta' Picao!

Piñatas. What is more fun than a piñata?  At any age really!

Bon Bon Ban

All Mexican Food. Tacos, Tortas, Tostadas, Arroz con Leche, Tres Leches, Pan Dulce, Enchiladas, Frijoles, Arroz, Tortillas; quite literally all Mexican foods!

Provecho

Ballet Folklórico. Just beautiful!  Puro Amor y Pasion en este baile.

Huaraches. Can’t ever find the huaraches we wore in Cerritos, SLP, but these are sort of close…Comfortable, fresh and cheap.

Si te queda el huarache...

Artesanias. Something as simple as bird can take on a whole new life, color and sabor under the creativity of a good artista mexicano(a).

Pasion, Amor, Arte

Mexican Coke. No te hagas. You know you’ve had it and it is not the same as the stuff they sell here.  Ni a los talones le llegan…

Como ninguna

And many, many other things…too many to list and mention here.  Mejor los dejo con estas palabras hechas tan famosos por el revolucionario Miguel Hidalgo y Costilla:

Mexicans!
Long Live the Heroes that gave us our Fatherland!
Long Live Hidalgo!
Long Live Morelos!
Long Live Josefa Ortiz de Dominguez!
Long Live Allende!
Long Live Aldama and Matamoros!
Long Live National Independence!
Long Live the Independence Bicentennial!
Long Live the Centennial of the Revolution!
¡Viva México!
¡Viva México!
¡Viva México!

El Casado Casa Quiere

He Who Gets Married A Home Wants

The following is not meant as an account of any true experiences neither by the author or anyone else closely related or associated to him, it is merely a humorous observation on the commonly held notion of Suegra-Nuera relations.  Any similarities to the reader’s personal experiences are purely coincidental.

Suegra-Nuera Relations

Because two adult women in a single home is never advisable, not even under the most urgent of circumstances, and especially not if the two women in question happen to be suegra and nuera, that is to say they share one common bond – a son and a husband, one in the same.

Not that a harmonious living environment under these conditions is impossible. Let’s just say it is highly unlikely.  Why?  For many reasons: some logical, some illogical, others personal, and most of them, if not all of them, entirely confusing to the poor fellow stuck in the middle.

So just for kicks, guys, here a few reasons why this is a bad idea:

1. Kitchen Wars – Q: Who is going to do most of the cooking? A1: Mom of course, she is the matriarch and more than likely knows her way around the kitchen a little better, but then the nuera runs the risk of adopting the title floja. A2: The new wife then, right?  Only problem: momma is not going to like the cooking and won’t approve of the way her son is being fed.  Which also begs the question who is going to wash the dishes? – a battle royale all on its own.

2.  Ropa Sucia – Yes, it will be washed at home where it should be, but again the battle over whether to use a trusty old bar of ZOTE or the latest new scented and fandangled laundry detergent will lead to unnecessary confrontations.  Prepare for secret trips to the lavanderia.

3.  To Hoard or Not to Hoard – One can’t stand to throw things away…everything has its use…the other couldn’t care less for anything that is not immediately necessary.  Should one inadvertently throw the other’s crap away, three words: RUN FOR COVER!!

4.  Child Rearing – “Why did you spank the morillos?”  “Hmm, that’s why those kids are so spoiled!”  “I always put my children first, above all else.”  “Poor kids, you must be starving.”  “Everything is so easy nowadays; anyone can call themselves a parent.”  - Have we learned nothing from Everybody Loves Raymond!?

5.  The Mighty Peso – You spend too much money, or never enough.  New pair of shoes, a dress, the nails done, a haircut and a do, dinner, a movie, y ni hablemos del precio del daycare, and uh…let the lectures on money commence.   If on the other hand, you’re tightfisted with the mula you may get a little speech about how you should be able to spend just a little bit of your hard-earned money on whatever you wish.

If by chance you’re fortunate enough to have mastered the art and science of keeping both suegra and nuera happy under one roof, stop, thank your lucky stars right now, and give some serious thought to writing a book for the rest of us out here. 

Why Not?

Tin Marín De Don Pingüé

Ilustración: Juan Reyes Haro

On summer days, for parties, or any other times we were bored, nothing was better than playing games with each other.  Usually without any actual toys, just our imagination, and a few lyrics we’d picked up somewhere along the way.  Some in English, some in Spanish, it was the main advantage of growing up with a family with so many kids.

Yes we had television. Radio.  Even farm animals.  But nothing compared to singing a few of these lyrics and carrying on:

Tin Marín de don Pingüé,
Cúcara, Mácara, Títere fue
yo no fui, fue Teté,
pégale, pégale
que ese merito se fue.

A la víbora, víbora
de la mar, de la mar
por aquí pueden pasar
Los de adelante corren mucho
y los de atrás se quedarán
tras, tras, tras, tras.

Una Mexicana que fruta vendía
ciruela, chabacano, melón y sandía.
Será melón, será sandía
será la vieja del otro día
dia, dia, día, día

Que llueva, que llueva,
la Virgen de la Cueva,
los pajaritos cantan,
las nubes se levantan,
¡Que si, que no,
que caiga un chaparrón!

Que siga lloviendo,
los pájaros corriendo,
florezca la pradera
al sol de Primavera.
¡Que si, que no!
¡Que caiga un chaparrón!
¡Que no me moje yo!

You’ve Got Anger – It’s Okay

iAnger

All I want to say today is hope.  Hope that things get better.  That they change.  That you have the strength to see this through, even if you’re not actually sure you want to.

Life is not all happiness.  Today is not a happy day.  Okay!  That doesn’t mean there won’t be others in the future.  There will be.  Don’t question it, just believe it.

This post I’m dedicating to everyone out there having a bad day.  Be mad.  Be angry.  Be furious.  Kick.  Scream.  Curse if you want to.  Get it all out.  Talk or write about it.  Then take a deep breath and tell yourself it’s going to be alright.  It will be.  Don’t worry about appearances or keeping them up for the sake of others.  You can if you want to, but that’s not going to make you feel any better.  It won’t.

Besides it’s good for others to see us struggling.  It makes their own pain less alien.  Tambien never underestimate the power of faith and prayer.

¡Que viva la paz!

Veintitrés

The Alanis family, begun almost four decades ago in the hills of Cerritos, San Luis Potosi, Mexico.  Exported by choice, sweat and tears to the valley’s of South Texas and beyond.  Now growing.  Growing up.  Growing stronger.

Arbol de la Vida

Dos Marias,
Dos Moiseses,
Un San Juan,
Irma Linda, Blanca Gloria,
Una Ambrosia,
Un Jesus.

Guillermo y Gustavo,
Isidoro.
La Anjelica,
Eva,
Y el gavacho, Paul.

De los niños,
Edgarito,
Gonzalito,
Gustavito y Alejandro.
Monica, Andrea, Genesis,
Jessica y Valentina.

Todos somos, Veintitrés.
Una Familia.
Sí así es.

El Azul Celeste Cuesta

Querido Hijo:

Hijo de la vida.

I’m going to tell you like my parents told me, ponte a estudiar para que no te toque trabajar como burro como nosotros! Even when the dreams seem long and far away, unattainable, silly, too damn high to ever come within reach, keep pushing, keep pulling, keep moving.  In baby steps, peleando, arrastrándote a ti mismo si es necesario. Not looking for the easy way out. There is none.

If you don’t believe me, go out there, make your mistakes, fall flat, get up, do it again, and again, and again.  Keep fooling yourself, believing your day will come one day.  If it does, count your blessings y ponte las pilas.   Sino, be humble enough to find another way.

Circumstances, bad luck, misfortune, tragedia.  Mijo, sadly, these are challenges and obstacles we don’t control.  Yo que más quisiera, quebrarme la espalda con tal de que tú no sufrieras ni un poquito. Pero la vida es así, cruel e injusta.

Nevertheless, my thoughts and prayers you will always have.  Always!

Del amor, what can I say?  No te apresures.  Nothing you can’t wait for.  All pain and heartache when it’s not right.  So hard to figure out when it is.  El amor por ti mismo, mucho más importante. Créeme.

When you finally make it, and I know you will, to that place in life set out for no one else but you, no dejes que tu orgullo te ciege.  Extiende la mano. Pull up the ones that follow.  Find solace in these words, wisdom in your journey, and compassion in your heart. Do for others what no one did for you.

O como yo, sigue el ejemplo de tus padres.